Infectiously Happy

Thoughts about things.

May has concluded. I have purged over 496 things. And yet there is still more I wish to rid myself of. This month has been beyond wonderful for a lot of reasons. I was surprised that so many people I know and love decided to join me for this challenge. They gave away clothes and books, old, useless ways of thinking and acting. My boo Stacy and her hubby even got rid of two cars! Through the entire time I was overwhelmed by a growing sense of lightness. I was able to help others with small gestures of giving and for that I am so grateful. I have a new sense of focus. I even have more time to do what serves my happiness because I am not busy cleaning, organizing & tending to my “things”. This process left me with renewed ideas and so much clarity. So here is what I want to share:

Find real power in letting go.

This applies to anything you cling to tightly. Clothes, relationships, habits or titles. People operate on this false belief that if they hold on tighter it can never be taken from them and all the while they don’t control any of it. The idea of control makes a fearful or out of control person feel powerful, but that power is an illusion. So yes take good care of the people and things you love but realize that any of it can be taken from you. What will you do then? Real power comes from loving yourself enough not to be defined by it and by letting go of what is keeping you from the life you truly want.

Things are a distraction.

Someone tried to argue with me about this point and here is what I said to them; Imagine you have an especially tough day. Tension with someone you love, stressful financial situation, irritating work situation… What is the solution? For a lot of people, there is an assumption that, “oh well, I had a tough day so I will Eat-shop-watch TV-medicate until I am numb from that discomfort”. I am guilty, especially of the shopping and to what end? It doesn’t fix anything… You end up with more crap then you know what to do with and you are no closer to a life that will make you happy. What if instead of burying ourselves in things we used authentic connections and experiences to handle stress? Are your things going to help you make a new resume to find a job that will make you happier? Will your things hold your hand when someone you love passes away? I enjoy vacation and free time with my family and friends more than any pair of shoes or dress. Memories from a life well lived will sustain me more than any “thing” I could possess.

You have the life you built.
This can be a tough pill to swallow. It’s hard to admit but many people, myself included, will say that they want something, like peace, but at every opportunity they respond in ways that create exactly the opposite. They have to have the last word in every “discussion”. They will never leave a job or relationship that is stress filled. They rant about traffic, their family, taxes, whatever… Then they look up and exclaim: I want peace! But do you really? Do you really want to be healthier, be in a loving relationship, travel, be happy, etc? Are you truly letting go of the things that will prevent you from building that life? If I want to build a boat but buy parts for a tree house, did I really intend to end up with a boat?

Gotta go… Up early for my baby’s first beach adventure. :-)

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